Application season is an exciting time for students and their families! Students may feel the pressure of juggling applications on top of senior year and extracurricular activities, and parents may feel the angst of trying to provide guidance to their student without overstepping. Here are three tips for parents to help their children as they navigate the college application and admission process.
Help Yourself First
Yes, you heard that right! Before even thinking about how to pour into your children, you have to make sure you are filled up. Consider ways of enacting self-care so that you can be a solid support for your child. This can include enjoying family time without engaging in college conversation, spending time on your own hobbies, and taking walks or hikes.
Self-care can also be self-reflection. There may be fears you need to work through about your child’s future so you can focus on their path rather than your own idea of what is best:
- What if they don’t get into the school you had hoped for them?
- What if they choose a major different than what you want them to choose?
- Are they going to be successful in life?
Working through these fears will help you be the best support for them in this challenging and uncertain time.
Encourage What They Are Already Doing
Is your child excelling in sports? Delving deep into their science class assignments? Getting straight As in English? Those are all excellent jumping-off points to help them build a strong application.
Start by fostering the activities, sports and clubs they’re already interested in. For example, if your child wants to start a club at their school but feels too scared, empower them and remind them that they can be successful. You can also help them find internships, volunteer opportunities, and other avenues that might invite them to dig deeper into their interests.
Create Healthy Boundaries
As challenging as it sounds, the decisions your child makes are not a reflection of you! While you may be excited for them to attend your alma mater, it might not be the best choice for them, and that’s okay. Focus on riding as a passenger in their experience rather than steering them in your direction.
At the same time, you should also have conversations with them about how their choices may affect the rest of the family. This can encompass anything from a location choice to the cost of their room and board to whether they plan to pursue a postgraduate degree. For example, if an out-of-state school is not an option for you financially, be honest about that and encourage them to make decisions based around what your family can provide.
Hopefully these tips will be a great starting point for you to continue expanding and learning how to best support your child as they begin to navigate this process. Best of luck to you and remember to keep breathing!
Additional Resources
- How Parents Can Make the College Admissions Process Less Stressful (The Washington Post, 8/18/2022)
- Parenting Through the College Application Process (CollegeAdvisor, 8/28/2021)
- Parenting During College Acceptance Season (Psychology Today, 3/1/2022)
- Parents Matter More (Inside Higher Ed, 6/6/2022)